Saturday, September 6, 2008

Happy Birthday Jack

I miss you. I hope your eighth birthday was super fun for you...I thought about you all day, praying for you and remembering when you were born. You were cuter than cute...quiet and still. Long fingers and spindly body covered with the simple white hospital shirt. I recall the memory with ease, and it makes me smile...and cry.

I wonder if you still like trains, or if you're too "big" for them. Do you like to build things? What is your favorite color? Do you like to eat broccoli? Who is your favorite friend to play with?

I know that the Lord has His hand on you, taking care of you and watching over you. I know that your Mom and Dad give you the love, tender care, and teaching moments you need. But I still miss you, and I still wonder, and I still pray...

I pray that someday I will meet you and you will think I'm silly and laugh at me. I pray that you will know me as the tummy mommy that loves you more than you can comprehend. I pray that you will grow up into a handsome young man that is challenged to work hard for the things that really matter, and that you will meet the Lord and call Him Abba, Father. I pray that your family is blessed beyond man's simple understanding of blessings, and that your lineage is touched by God's guidance, grace, hope and peace.

I pray for all of this because my arms are empty for you, while my heart overflows. Jack, may your life be great and good and touched by God.

Love,
Tummy Mommy Tiffany

P.S. Eight years ago, today, I gave birth to an 8 lbs 1 oz baby boy at 5:24 p.m. The next evening, around the same time, I had the honor of blessing a family who couldn't have children with their first, and only, son. I could not give the little boy the things he needed, and I chose to give him the chance to have what lacked in my life...father's arms to rest in.
I have a Daddy whom I have not lived with since I was around 2, and I have a beautiful relationship with him now. But growing up, I didn't have a father to stear me in the right direction every day. I know the consequences of taking that variable out of the equation...well, if you want to know more about it, maybe I'll write a book...
Just wanted to make a note to those who aren't familiar with the circumstance.

A father of the fatherless and a judge for the widows, is God in His holy habitation.
Psalm 68:5

2 comments:

April said...

Hi Honey,
What a beautiful tribute to Jack. It made me cry all over again. I hope we get to see him again someday too. What a happy day that will be. And by the way, Happy Birthday to you on the 13th!! I won't forget that day! Little Miss 8 lbs. 10.5 ozs!! Too big for your little dress I bought to bring you home in. And now you're my littlest squirt!! My freckliest and funniest one too!!

Love,
Mama

Lobug said...

You made me cry too. That was beautiful. Happy Birthday, Friend!!!!